Intro with Kitties and Starbucks

Scene 1

CLEO THE CAT

Hello, Cleo the Cat here. I’m one of Susan’s former clients back home in Saskatchewan. We’ve known each other for years. Some would say she was my “cat-sitter” but I was the one who sat on her the most so that doesn’t really make sense, does it?

Anyway, the last time she sat for me was about a year ago when she was going through this weird-unrequited-[but-possibly-requited]-post-millenial-relationship-breakup.  She was extremely, intimately confused about everything and feeling every Feel that could possibly be felt. She would sit on the couch with a fuzzy little blanket and I would sit on her squishy, soft thighs and she would talk and talk and talk about men and their sad little faces and their manly little Man-Men Stuff. She thanked me later for being her anchored-ness in her “turbulent Man Storm” period of life.

It has come to my attention that Susan is currently going through a similar situation AGAIN. So I called her up and asked her why she’s being a little B[*tch] and crying about stupid stuff. She told me the story and we both agreed it would be best if I told it because I am smarter, wiser and altogether her wingman and her grounded best friend that can slap some sense into her.

So let’s get things straight, I’m a cat, not an editor. Meaning– My grammar is good for a feline but not good as a human. But since I am me and you are you, these things bug me not-ly as they might bug you. Sorry/Not sorry.

Let the story begin.

Scene 2

CLEO THE CAT
The main door to The Parkdale Hostellerie is a big
black utility door with three different doorbells. She
didn’t know which was the right one so she pushed them
all and waited. A slim, young woman with long brown
hair opened the door. She wore a black t-shirt and grey
sweats. She was a natural beauty with a girl-next-door
kind of vibe.

SOFIA
Hi. I’m Sofia. Are you Susan?

SUSAN

Yes. I know I’m a bit early for check-in so I’ll just drop off my bags and go for a walk, I think.

SOFIA

No problem. We are relaxed here. Come in. I’ll show you around. Where are you from?

SUSAN
Saskatachewan.

SOFIA
Saska- what?

SUSAN
Saskatchewan. It’s a couple provinces over. Like, right
in the middle of Canada. Where are you from?

SOFIA
Chile. I’m here on a holiday-work visa. I came in July.
Back home I’m a dentist but I wanted to travel a bit after school and practice my English.

SUSAN
Did you know English before you came?
(She shakes her head.)
You picked it up in four months?!That’s
impressive.

CLEO THE CAT
The two of them climbed up the staircase to the second
floor and tugged Susan’s luggage with them. They walked
down a hallway with white walls where Sofia lead Susan
to Apartment 3. It was spacious and bright with
laminate hardwood flooring and white walls.

SOFIA
This is the women’s apartment. You’ll be staying here.
I was off yesterday so I don’t know who’s in that bunk
but you can choose one. You can do that after, let me
show you some more.

CLEO THE CAT
Sofia leads Susan into the living room where there are
couches, beanbag footstools, a kitchenette, and a
dining table.

SOFIA
Your room is Girls Only but anybody can come sit in
this space. The other room is a private room with one
bed. People are staying there now but I don’t know
who… So many people here. There’s a couple bathrooms,
sinks outside and the showers are in here. Come with me
to the kitchen. I’ll show you around.

SUSAN
Should I lock up my stuff?

SOFIA
We mostly have an open door–um, open door… What’s
that word?

SUSAN
Policy?

SOFIA
Si! An open door policy. Come with me. I want to show
you the other apartment.

CLEO THE CAT
Susan followed her out of Apartment 3 into the hall. To
the right, there was a closed door that read, “ARTIST’S
STUDIO.”

SOFIA
This is Lara’s office. She is the owner. You will meet
her later. She uses the studio as an office and for guests as a private room.

CLEO THE CAT
Sofia opens the door to Apartment 2 where there is a
big, blue velvet couch to the right of the entrance, a
shoe rack, and two small coffee tables– one made of
wooden logs and another with a wood top with a wire
bottom.

SOFIA
Welcome to Apartment 2! It’s our kitchen and place to
hang out as groups and maybe some storage, too–
Oops. One of our guest who’s been staying a long time
works nights and sleeps during the day. We be quiet.
Let me see if he– yes, he still sleeping.
(she whispers)
This is the kitchen. Use what you need. Please wash
what you use.

Enter Kramer (23), tall, skinny German with an
armful of Starbucks frappacinos and treats.

KRAMER
Hola, mi bella!

SOFIA
Kramer!

KRAMER
Vengo con golosinas.
(“I come with treats.”)

SOFIA
Gracias!
(“Thank you.”)

SOFIA
Susan, this is Kramer. Kramer meet Susan.

KRAMER
Hi.

SUSAN
Hi.

KRAMER
Where are you from?

SUSAN
Saskatchewan.

KRAMER
Oh. Okay. I’m from Germany.
Got a job with Lufthansa a couple weeks ago–

SUSAN
Luf-what?

KRAMER
Lufthansa. It’s a German airline. I got a job with them
a couple weeks ago, packed up my stuff and now I’m
here. I don’t start for another month so I’m just
enjoying myself for now. You? What do you do?

SUSAN
I’m an actor and writer.

KRAMER
Oo! Nice. Have you met my girlfriend, Sofia?

SOFIA
Not a girlfriend. Just a girl who is a friend. Right,
Kramer?

KRAMER
Si, mi senora.
(“Yes, my lady.”)

CLEO THE CAT
Kramer and Sofia sat down at the table to enjoy the
Starbucks he brought them.

SUSAN
I’m going to go for a walk and scope out the
neighbourhood. See you two later!

KRAMER
Bye!

SOFIA

Tonight I’ll introduce you to everybody. See you!

They wave goodbye. Susan exits. 

SOFIA
¿Qué significa “Scope out”?
(“What does ‘scope out’ mean?”)