Published during Creative Writing in period 5. We were all writing 😉
I’m subbing at Regina Christian School. The student leadership team put together a little contest to celebrate Valentine’s Day. Each girl receives a heart necklace. The boys try to get the girls to talk to them. If they succeed, they win their heart. These were some of things I saw:
- The moment one the hearts were handed out in a grade nine math class, one of the boys shouted, “HEY __________! IF YOU DON’T WANNA BE MY VALENTINE, SAY HI! 1, 2, 3, GO!” You could see her inner turmoil as she inhaled and hesitated but the educational assistant told her to hold on and not fall for it. So she did.
- One of the grade 10’s girls pulled me aside after our poetry lesson and asked me, “If you accidentally stub a guy’s toe with a chair and then say ‘sorry,’ does that count? ‘Cuz you, like, hurt him?” I look over at the guy whose toe I assumed was stubbed, he was sitting there with the smuggest grin. Just nodding. I diverted the question by saying, “I don’t know,” and watched them sit there in awkward silence while he waited for her to give him her heart. She was fighting every impulse to argue and but you could tell she was losing the battle.
- The grade twelve boys were all wearing a heart necklace (I’m assuming it was their girlfriend’s). One of the EAL students in grade 12 strut into class with about 10 hearts around his neck. The boys on the side of the room give him a nod of approval. He sits in his desk proud.
- Another grade 10 calls me over to referee a situation where three boys are huddled around her and her friend. “Can we have some ground rules? They keep taking my stuff and poking me.” I agree and tell the boys to find another way. Only I said it in a super melodramatic way, “If you want to win a woman’s heart, don’t do it by stealing her stuff or poking her.” One of the boys looked at his friend, pointed at me, and was, like, “Did she just say, ‘win a woman’s heart?'” and I realized after that, yeah, that sounded a bit bizarre.
I woke up this morning and made chicken in the oven before school. Ate it with spicy mayo. It was the best.
I had a couple teacher-fails today. Ugh. I’m so used to dealing with kids who require a lot of classroom management that when I come to Regina Christian School, I’m still in military mode. Not in a mean way. ‘Military’ in an orderly way and maybe a little skeptical and slightly on edge. I mean, not always. I think I’m a lot more relaxed than I was before but I’m just not used to the ‘freedom’ the students have. Every school is so different. Today I got a little micromanag-y ’cause the students kept asking to go to the bathroom and then to their locker and then to the computer lab and then to the their locker again and then to write their test and I was just like, what. is. going. on. And the one who wanted to write her test had a legit family emergency and I was really skeptical of everything at that moment so I asked a lot of questions because it was weird how they were all getting up and leaving class. The girl started crying, I felt awful and apologized. She told me it wasn’t me but I felt responsible. Poo. I hope she’s okay.
I’m thankful for snow and my contacts.
I’ve been curious about law for a while now, especially teaching it. I’m thankful that I think (heavy on the ‘think’) I might’ve found a way to reach a couple goals without lose the things I love. Possibly. Hopefully. Just gotta map it out now.
I’m thankful I found my keys.
I’m thankful for the kids I teach at The Globe. We had a really good class last night. I was nervous about how to choreograph the beginning. We’re still in the brainstorming phase but we’ve got a base to work with and it was actually a lot of fun.
I’m thankful for the grace the teachers and admin have shown me. I’m grateful for the reminders that I still have a long way to go.
This morning when eating my chicken, spicy mayo, and a cup of coffee, I sat down to read Psalm 139. My brain was distracted with things I need to do so some of the words went in one eye and out the other. But as I write this I’m realizing that I don’t always understand the weird things my anxiety suggests I do. Nor do I understand why I listen to it. Nonetheless, I was reminded of the psalm I was reading and how God knit me together. How He knows me better than I know myself. And even though I’m imperfect, He likes me this way and I like that He likes that.
If I was playing the heart game today, then I think God won mine. Truthfully, He was the first man I spoke to today.