Today is a day where I need to be thankful and write a list down. Not because it’s easy but because it’s necessary.
- On Monday, I worked with those kindergarteners I wrote a poem about. We had a good day. It was our first good day in a very long time. It sounds very small but it was a big thing for us.
- On Tuesday, the staff and admin at the same school from #1 began to implement a plan to help with various behaviours in that same kindergarten class. I am thankful for this because it was a difficult situation that was dealt with in a professional and sensitive manner. The admin were put in a challenging situation. They stayed firm in their decision and found a way to solve the problem. I didn’t know how it would play out when they first began but they found a way to make it work with what we have. It was well-played and it’s something I admire a lot about their leadership.
- I’m thankful to finally have a church to call home. This basically means I’m committing to one church rather than 2 or 5. They are careful not to make it a legalistic thing where we’re serving this number of hours or blah blah blah. From what I understand, it’s a mutual agreement saying I commit to letting you in, holding me accountable, and sticking around even when it’s hard. So basically it’s like a gang but less violence, sex, drugs or money. Just kidding. We’re family. That’s what it means. It’s not about how many hours you serve or how well you read your bible or pray, it’s committing to my faith and living that out in community. I’d really like that. Having a place to belong is so important.
- Within ten minutes of service ending on Sunday, one of the grandpas asked me if I had a boyfriend. I said no. “You are a monument of man’s stupidity,” he says. I laughed so hard. That has got to be the best compliment I’ve ever heard. Ever. Anyway, grandpa is trying to set me up with a missionary from India, “He’s tall,” he says with a twinkle in his eye. Someone must’ve told him chicks dig tall guys because he’s really pushing the tall thing. I’m 5’2″ so almost every guy is tall to me. “And nice.” Flips through his phone, “I just need to find his photo…” He’s having a hard time finding it. I tell him we can wait till next week if he wants but he seems very determined. I tell him about the documentary, Meet the Patels, and how he’s exactly like the parents in the movie. Still flipping through his phone, “He’s a comedian.” I nod. This is very surreal. I’ve never had a grandpa try to set me up on a date. “Anyway, you just pray about it,” he says, “If it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be. If not, it’s not. But I’m a matchmaker, you know.” I’m thankful for this because it put a smile on my face.
- I’m thankful for vets and antibiotics and probiotics to help with a bad bout of kitty diarrhea. I gave her some cooked chicken and I guess she can’t handle it… so that was on me. But I’m thankful she’s on the mend.
- Yesterday, I had a very bad day. And when I say bad, I mean, Mental Breakdown Bad. Hyperventilating Bad. I don’t say that to win your pity but because it’s Bell Let’s Talk Day and I’m trying to be transparent/vulnerable so as to connect with my readers. Or whatever people do when they are trying to open up. Anyway, point is it was a very bad day. A very bad day, indeed. I won’t get into the details but there were a number of things that caused it to deteriorate. That morning my devotion was about being merciful. Jesus’s sermon on the Mount. Blessed are the merciful for they shall be shown mercy. In the moment, the only mercy I could grant was to hold my tongue, get through the day and walk away. I don’t know how these situations will end. I will likely just have to push through it, mind my own business and survive till this is over. I’m not particularly thankful for that but I am grateful for reminders to be merciful when I don’t want to be. Maybe things will continue to deteriorate (please, God, no) but even if they do, I know I can get through it because I’ve had to do hard things before. In the meantime, I’ll do what I can to maintain some level of professionalism, kindness and peace.